Why Are You Still Single?!

Living in Croatia, I feel like I get a lot more pressure to settle down and get married. I think that it is more common for women to get married in their early twenties. I'm nearly 30 and no where near getting married. I don't even have a boyfriend! It makes me laugh because friends will say to me, "You're going to get married next!" I'm not sure how that is possible since I need to be dating someone in order to get to the marriage talk.

So why am I not in a relationship? It's not that I can't find a guy to be with here and it's not like I haven't been dating because I have. I have been out on dates and I have had some really good times, yet no one has really convinced me that I should give up my single ways in favor of a relationship. It's not their fault really. I make sure that they can't. In fact, the last thing that I want is someone falling in love with me and me breaking their heart. For those who are closest to me, it's no secret that I went through a very difficult break up and feeling the pain of a broken heart is not something that I would ever wish upon anyone. So, I figure, until I know for sure that I am ready to do the whole relationship thing, I purposely stay away from men who are looking to for a girlfriend. It's pretty easy for me too. When I go out with someone who is really cool or someone that I really like, I just find something that I don't like and focus on that. "He's a great guy. He has everything going for him, a job, a house, good head on his shoulders, good looking, but the other night I noticed that he had a mole on his arm and that will never do." Or "I like him, but his eyes are too close together." Or "He has a stray hair on his head and I will never be OK with that." Yup, it's that simple for me.

I think I'm just in that mode of wanting to enjoy the life that I have made for myself. I made my bed and I desperately want to lie in it for a while. I've been single for nearly two years now. The first year really sucked because of the whole broken heart thing and hating every couple on the planet. Now, I feel like I have really come into my own and am loving every single minute of it. I'm doing the things that I want to do and not worrying about anyone else but myself. As someone who is really good at devoting herself to the one she loves, it's been great fun finally loving myself and who I am and making no apologies for it.

At the end of the day, I will settle down eventually. In fact, I have met a couple of guys that I would give up my single life for, but because I know that, I keep them at a distance or push them away. Maybe I'm scared of giving that much of myself again to someone else. Or maybe I'm just not ready to be in a relationship yet. I don't know, but what I do know is, I am having a lot of fun!

Tourist Season

It's been quite a summer and I have to admit that I'm a bit tired! When I first moved here, my parents would say, just wait until you experience the tourist season, then you will understand. I scoffed! I'm still young, surely it can't be that bad! It's not that it's bad, it's just exhausting!

I don't have, what you would call, a full time job. I manage our property as it is rented out in the summer to tourists. Yet, having to deal with tourists can be extremely exhausting. These people are on vacation and don't have a care in the world, just like me when I came here on vacation. Yet, if I had the opportunity to sit down and chat with all of these tourists this is what I would say:

1. While this may not be your home, it is ours, please treat it with respect. I had people who rented the apartment for two days and trashed the place. It looked like they had brought in a bucket of sand and spread it across the floor. Not to mention the walls that looked like they had splashed drinks or something on them or them using every dish in the apartment, then putting the dirty dishes back. It took me three days to properly clean it and even then I still couldn't quite get all of the sand.

2. Just because your vacation isn't going as you thought it would go doesn't mean you should take it out on us. I had a couple rent the apartment because their last place was too small. When I told them that they had to climb up the stairs to get to my place, they had a fit, yet they still decided to stay. Angry, they made a huge mess, took our apartment towels down to the beach and brought back tons of sand in the towels and didn't bother to leave them outside. The worst part is that they left a horrible review and literally made things up because they were having a crappy holiday. Please be aware that this is how we make our money and by writing horrible things that aren't even true can in fact hurt us in the long run.

3. If you drive to Dubrovnik in July and August don't complain about parking. Every guidebook in the world tells tourists not to drive to Dubrovnik in high season. Parking can be difficult enough in the winter when there are no tourists, but it's damn near impossible in July and August.  Oh and if you drive a 10 passenger van, all I have to say to you is Good Luck.

4.  Please don't throw your trash into the sea. We have the most amazing sea and we would like to keep it that way.

5. Don't blame me for not learning your language. Ok, I'm American so learning a second language wasn't that high on the list. Croatians can usually speak two or three languages and those are usually, English, German, French, and/or Italian. If you don't speak one of those languages, we are going to have a very difficult time communicating with you so please be patient with us.

Those are just a few things that I would say. It's definitely been a learning experience for me and has made me appreciate a lot of what people do here and other tourist places. People on vacation can be exhausting and while we need them to survive, I hope that they understand that a little bit of kindness goes a long way for us.

Vespa: 1 Marina: 0

In my 29 years I have never actually driven a Vespa/motorbike. I've been on them all the time, always with someone else driving them. So when my friend was looking to buy an old Vespa, they said that I could use that bike to learn how to ride one.

You see, living in Dubrovnik, it's completely natural for people to have a motorbike. Most people around here own a motorbike. Dubrovnik is a small town and there is a lot of traffic in the summer so having a motorbike to ride around town in is perfect.

Since moving here, I always wanted to have one. I thought that they are just so much more convenient than my massive car. Yesterday, I finally got my chance to get on a Vespa and try it out for myself. Now, this Vespa is quite old and is a manual. The gears and clutch are on one handle bar while the gas and the break are on the other handle bar. I can drive a manual car and the concept on a bike is basically the same, except you are using your hands to push the clutch in and speed up. When I got on the bike and started to go forward, I realized just how powerful this machine is and was slightly intimated, but I managed to make the bike go. The video below is my first attempt on the bike. I was quite excited!

 

As you can see, I was a little unbalanced but otherwise successful...That is until my next attempt. I don't really know what happened. I had the clutch in first gear. It was a straight shot, in fact it was the exact same driveway that I was going down. Yet, when I pushed the clutch in and gave it some gas, the bike jerked which startled me. The next thing I know, the motorbike is heading straight for a wall. In these situations, people always say that you need to remain calm and think clearly. I'm sorry, but I was heading for a wall, my brain was not thinking clearly. In fact, it was having a blonde moment at the worst possible time. Instead of hitting the brake, I kept pressing the gas. I let go of the clutch thinking it would stop the motorbike. Why on earth would I think that?!!! My car is a stick shift. I know that when I let go of the clutch the car will keep running because that's how the car continues to move. Yet, in that moment, I got it into my head that by, letting go of the clutch, the bike will miraculously stop. Of course, I was still pressing on the gas which was making me go faster and only freaked me out more. At one point, I think I tried to stop the bike by putting my feet on the ground as if I was riding a bicycle. Seriously, as I headed for the wall, all logic left my brain and for a moment I went completely stupid. What else could I do, but run right into the wall. And wouldn't you know it, when I let go of the gas, low and behold the bike shut off. Amazing! Not sure why I didn't think of that sooner!

When I ran into the wall, I fell and the bike landed on me. My legs and arm are a bit scraped up with a few bruises. It hurt like hell, but I was actually more concerned about the bike. The only thing that I could think of was, great, they let me get on their bike and I crash it. Go me! The bike was fine and, although, a little bruised up, I am also fine. Once my friend and her husband realized I was all right, we all had a good laugh. It's just a shame that she didn't get it on video. 

As for me and the Vespa, I will be getting back up on that horse soon enough. I am determined to learn how to ride one. A few bruises won't stop me!