A Rose Colored View

When I first moved here, I would go out with my cousin. I met all of her friends and many of the locals here. When I told them that I moved here they would give me a strange look and ask why. They couldn't believe that I would leave California for Dubrovnik. As if Dubrovnik is the biggest shit hole in the world. They really thought I was absolutely crazy for moving over here. The other day someone had told me that they wanted to move to the states to which I gave them a very strange look and asked why? And I realized that I now sounded like I was saying that the US is the biggest shit hole in the world and why would anyone want to ever move there. Obviously, that's not true, but it did get me thinking about why we as a people do that. Why do we always think that the grass is greener on the other side. The best analogy that I could come up with is that it's a lot like dating (it seems to be a theme in my life). Dating has several stages and I think that it's a perfect way to see how some of us think that other places are better than home. In my mind dating goes like this: Lust at first sight, first date, honeymoon, reality, bail or stay.

Lust: In dating, it's the I will do anything to have that person stage...Let's move this to my experience with living here. I started coming to Croatia every summer when I was in High school. I would stay in Dubrovnik for the summer and I would LOVE life. I would sit by the sea all day and go out at night. I thought, this place is amazing!! I would give anything just to wake up to this every day. I love it here! This place is the best! All of the people of Dubrovnik are sooooo lucky!

First Date: It's the getting to know you stage, we are always on our best behavior. Every summer, Dubrovnik glistened. It's was perfect in every way. The weather was perfect and water was warm and we could swim all day long. All I saw was happiness all around me. The aroma was intoxicating and I knew I was in love. This place would be mine one day and we will have a happy life together!

Honeymoon: It's the we are dating and we couldn't be happier phase. When I first moved here, I was in the euphoria of Dubrovnik. The city had my whole heart. The weather was so amazing when I arrived. I loved every moment of it and refused to see any downside to it. The city was perfect and I couldn't be happier.

Reality: The true colors stage. Winter. Holy shit, this place is DEAD in the winter. There is absolutely nothing to do. I started seeing the other side to the town. It's freaking cold here in the winter. No one leaves their house! And things don't get done very fast here, you have to fight for everything that you want. Internet is down? They might show up...in a week...after you called five times...You lied to me Dubrovnik! You were supposed to be warm and sunny all year round and glisten! You aren't glistening! Why aren't you glistening?!?!

Bail or stay: Now that you know who they really are, do you stay or leave? This is the phase where I either had to accept that this was the reality of this town and this country or leave.

I chose to stay because, at the end of the day, Dubrovnik still holds my heart. And while I now see the dark side to this place, it's not enough for me to let it go. We all wear rose colored glasses when we think of other places. Being raised among a large Croatian community, we are taught to be proud Croatians. I mean, I loved Croatia long before I ever stepped foot on Croatian soil. And I will admit that I had a very different idea about this place when I first moved here. And while reality has set in, I still love Croatia, for better or worse. Plus, these people are really entertaining to me.

I guess we just have to realize that sometimes the grass isn't always greener on the other side, but which ever path you choose it will definitely be fun!